Everyone deserves a second chance and Tuesday night the rejected comics got their shot. From the historic Alex Theatre, Jay Mohr invited back Corey, Bonnie, Jay, Ant, and Todd to participate in the Wild Card competition.

By Christine Blackmon
Reality Reel Media
08.02.04

Jay started off the night with his usual monologue, which included his take on “everyone deserves a second chance,” and his motto: “life is tough, wear a cup.” Corey Holcomb started off the Wild Card competition with jokes about how freaky, low quality people stay in your life. He then shared with the audience his updated version of the wedding vows: “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to day to unite this fool’s bank account into this woman’s possession. If anyone has a problem with this speak now or forever say it behind their backs.” To end his set Corey joked about how he grew up poor: “At Christmas time we didn’t have a tree, we just threw a green blanket over the coat rack.” Bonnie McFarlane was up next—and she spoke about the super powers of old people: “Wherever you go –there they are.” Her repertoire consisted of “ When meeting someone, they say: pleasure to meet you—she says: give it a minute,” and how she takes Spanish every morning from 7 to 9 or at least till “the construction on the house next door is done.”

Jay London began with his many humble thank-yous’s, moving on to the one-line zingers. “Motel six in Amish country—do you think they leave the light on?, I’m self employed, I manage my own hair, Thinking about joining a support group—welfare.” Jay ended his set with a spin off of the ever-popular MasterCard commercials: “Flowers-$25 reluctantly, wining and dining $150--catastrophic, trying to get on first base—unattainable. For everything else there’s master-bate.” Ant was up next and he began by announcing that he lost 31pounds: “Atkins and crystal meth are amazing.” Then there was the signature “gay jokes.” He hates cliché’s: “Every man’s fantasy is to be with two women together—not everyman’s.” He then targeted his Mom: “ My mom hates the fact that I’m gay—she is a Greek immigrant from the Island of Lesbos, so I tease her: Mom what are people from Texas called—Texans, what are people from Athens called—Athenians, and what are people from your island called—Les-- --Greeks!”

Todd Glass rounded out the competition with his set on how no one is honest when they’re late: no one says: “Sorry I left late.” Then he started on the topic of “what if-ing.” “What if you were pulled over by the cops and you stuck your head out the window and went Grrrr-Grrrr –I’m the cookie monster—they can’t arrest you for that.”

With all the jokes said and done—now it was America’s time to decide who would be joining the final five and given their second chance.

On Thursday night, Jay Mohr welcomed the five hopefuls to the stage once again and the final five weighed in. The consensus was that Ant, Todd, and Jay’s sets were tight. Jay announced each comic and one by one they performed a final set. Then the comics were welcomed back onstage to reveal the results. One by one comics were eliminated until it was down to Jay London and Todd Glass—who anxiously stood there. The winner was announced—Jay London would be crossing the stage, joining the final group, and moving on.